If you go to a bookstore and check out the “Love & Relationships” section, you’ll find shelves of books of people sharing their opinions, personal experience, and thoughts about what makes marriage work.
Only a handful of those books will be based on actual research.
Dr. Gottman is the godfather of marriage research. For over 40 years he’s studied thousands of couples. He puts them in an apartment, measures their heart rate, their facial expressions, the stress hormones in their urine and blood, how much they sweat, their communication habits… the list goes on and on.
He tracked these couples over time and found specific behaviors and signals that a couple’s relationship was going to end in disaster if things didn’t change.
He also identified the habits and behaviors of the marriage masters. The people who lived happily together for decades as their love grew deeper and more meaningful.
He got so good at identifying the difference between marriage masters and the future disasters that he can predict divorce with over 90% accuracy just by watching a couple argue for a few minutes.
This week, you are getting a master-class in part of Dr. Gottman’s research, and the research of many others...
You’ll begin to master the skill of turning conflict into connection.
You’ll learn the best way to bring up a difficult topic. How to navigate the emotions that can throw you off course and erode your love, and how to fortify your relationship against the threats that infiltrate and destroy so many.
You cannot have a truly incredible relationship unless you master the skills in this challenge.
And you master them by DOING them… and that’s what this challenge is all about.
So, welcome to the Turning Conflict into Connection Challenge. We’re so excited to have you join, because this Challenge will be life-changing for you and your spouse.
This week, your Primary Objective will be to identify one negative conflict habit you have in your relationship, and make a plan to improve it.
You’ll be tempted to look at your partner and identify all the things your partner is doing wrong, but that’s not how you succeed in this challenge!
If you look at yourself first, I guarantee that you’ll see a big improvement in your conflicts and your relationship as a whole.
We know this challenge can be life-changing for you, so we’re so excited for you to dive in!